It's currently 5am for me over on me little, miserable island known as the UK. It seems writing before you sleep is the best way to analyse the thoughts that have revealed themselves during the day, so I'm going to take this chance to write my first blog here at MudDomain!

I've never really been one for MU* communities, I've always found they held too much needless animosity and tension between members, especially when you're at a point where you wish to post something and bring up an issue, but constantly backspace to make sure you're completely un-flamable(if there is such a thing). However, I do see potential in this place and at this point find the members to be of a positive nature, something a personality like mine thrives on.

Anyway, what got me thinking today was in the form of a question asked by Caius over at SWC. Are you a project-guy or do you prefer seeing games through, sticking around to help run the place? This to me is one of the best questions I've been asked in a long time, and quite frankly, something I've never really thought about. So I've spent a long while thinking about it, in hopes of discovering something new from the situation.

I've been involved with MUDs for a moderate amount of time, I'm only 19, so I can't admit to having much of a historical development, or even gaming, background. Regardless though, I've always been more interested in the development area than the gaming area. Ever since I could remember I've wanted to be involved with game design as a career, a hobby, a way of life. It's part of me, something people have laughed at or criticised over the years but it's something I've stuck to, through the presence of MU* games, it's brought that reality closer. It's enabled me, since I was younger, to look at all video games differently, not just play them to burn time or because they're fun, but to analyse them as I'm doing so and I feel that sort relationship with games is hard to come-by at a young age. But does this reflect how I utilise the information I have? Am I simply hungry for information so that I can acquire even more information? What am I building up to?

It probably sounds like nonsense and may just be due to lack of sleep, but these questions followed the base question and I've come to the conclusion that I am a project sort of person. I become attached to the projects I'm involved with but I only see it through until the game is released, or if there's no need for me to be around to maintain it. I'm not an 'immortal' or staff member per se. I'm just a project worker that starts the games to later hand them off to someone else when the time comes. I just want to make games, use what I know to deliver some quality. I'm not sure whether or not that'll change though, during my time working with Caius over at SWC I've grown fond of the place and it's setup and may end up sticking around for a while longer. That's speculation though, I can't predict the future and neither can Caius (even if he is a skin-head Qui-Gon), all I can assume is what is most likely - and what's most likely is I'll find another project afterwards when my time is up.

Before I turn in for the night I have a few questions of my own towards anyone reading this. I want to know whether anyone else feels the same towards game development. I'm not asking as a developer but as someone taking a step back from it. Do you see games as I do? If not how differently? Do you stay to run them? Do you stay to play them? Or do you move on and start/join a new project?

Tsun